If you’re an ally looking to celebrate Pride Month non-performatively, this is the blog for you. Learn more about how you can support the LGBTQ+ community this Pride Month and year-round with these recommendations.
June has easily become one of my favorite months for two reasons: 1.) my birthday is in June (happy birthday, me!) and 2.) it’s Pride Month! As an ally, I love the opportunity to witness the joy of my queer friends and clients and the surrounding LGBTQ+ community. After all, this is their month to shine and I view Pride Month as another opportunity to show up for them! If you’re looking for ways to show up for the queer community this Pride Month (and for the months and years down the road), here are a few places to start.
During Pride Month (and really, all year round), check in with yourself.
Ask “is what I’m doing helpful to the LGBTQ+ community or is it just helping me?” and be honest! If you feel that an action that you’re doing is self-serving, figure out a way to make so that it becomes helpful for the community you’re trying to serve. For instance, taking a photo of yourself as a cis-het ally at Pride could be viewed as self-serving, but going with a queer friend or loved one to show support is helpful (when in doubt, ask if they’d like your support).
If you do attend a Pride event or rally, whether on your own or to support a queer loved one, be respectful and accepting.
This is not the time for you to judge or gawk at people or to make comments like “I just don’t get that [insert sexual identity or orientation].” Additionally, be prepared to give up space; not every space is meant for you during Pride festivities and it’s your job to be okay with that. This could look like not monopolizing a conversation with comments like “not all straight people are…” or attending events like a leather bar, a bear party, or Dyke March after party (source).
Learn more about rainbow capitalism and call out organizations and individuals that utilize these practices.
In short, Rainbow Capitalism is the practice of incorporating queer people and culture into marketing and products without any meaningful benefit to LGBTQ+ people. Many stores will sell Pride products during June without passing any of the profits on to queer creators or organizations and the more insidious forms of Rainbow Capitalism include corporations that use inclusive marketing while donating to anti-LGBTQ+ political candidates or causes. Don’t be fooled by the rainbow-colored logos.
Donate and raise money for LGBTQ+ non-profits.
Whenever possible, always strive for mutual aid. Support your local mutual aid organizations and help LGBTQ+ community members directly in your area. Donate to non-profit organizations that are actively fighting against anti-LGBTQ+ and/or anti-trans laws. Support queer people securing housing, getting gender-affirming surgeries, getting the healthcare they need, and more by running a quick search on GoFundMe. Have any queer friends? Send them some money!
Read about LGBTQ+ history and literature and/or listen to LGBTQ+ podcasts.
This is a great way to learn more about the LGBTQ+ community, their perspectives, the issues they’ve faced and are continuing to fight, and more, without burdening your queer loved ones with the burden of teaching you. If you do want to ask a queer loved one a question, please ask if you can ask the question first and give the opportunity to say no. (Side note: I’m currently reading Living Queer History: Remembrance and Belonging in a Southern City by Samantha Rosenthal and it’s so fascinating! It’s a lovely mixture of LGBTQ+ history specific to the Southwest Virginia region and personal memoir.)
Make it common practice to use and ask for pronouns.
Put your pronouns in your social media bios, place them in your email signature, strive to introduce yourself with your pronouns (Hi! I’m Cameron, pronouns she/her), and ask others that you interact with for their pronouns. If you mistakenly refer to someone with the incorrect pronouns, don’t make a big deal out of it; apologize, use the correct pronouns, and move on.
Recognize that you don’t need to fully understand someone’s identity to be a good ally.
Your job is simply to believe it when someone tells you their identity and respect it, even if it may seem contradictory to you. Here’s a really good quote from Theo Nash’s Business Guide to a Non-Performative Pride that explains why this is so important:
“The LGBTQ+ community is not one singular community. Every letter within the acronym has its own unique multitudes of communities. For any of these terms, you can Google their definitions, but know that concrete definitions with hard edges don’t always work well in real-life queer communities. In real life, the boundaries and definitions are often blurred, full of beautiful nuance, and varied. People can change and adapt and hold multiple identities at once even if they might feel like the identities are contradicting themselves. Bottom line – The LGBTQ community is beautifully nuanced, and we should believe people when they tell us their identities. There is no real “check box of qualifications” to be LGBTQ+.”
These things are only a small handful of action items that you can do this Pride Month to show your genuine support for the LGBTQ+ community, but your queer friends, family members, and loved ones will greatly appreciate the effort this month, for the rest of the year, and for many years to come.
Do you or your business consider yourself an ally to the LGBTQ+ community and wish to serve your queer clientele better? This other blog I’ve written may be of interest for you: The Future of the Wedding Industry: The Importance of Using Gender Neutral Wedding Language.
Are you a couple looking for an LGBTQ+ friendly and affirming photographer for your elopement? You’ve found me! My name’s Cameron (she/her) and I am SO ready to help you take the reins on your special day and plan your own intimate elopement in Virginia! Fill out an inquiry form to get started or check out my pricing to learn more about my philosophy, practice, and packages.
Celebrating LGBTQ+ couples and their love is my passion. I recognize that there needs to be more LGBTQ+ representation within the wedding industry and, instead of waiting for the industry to improve, I decided to be the change. I see my work as a form of advocacy that will amplify the presence of the LGBTQ+ community and cultivate a culture that favors love, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity + expression.
I encourage you to check out some of the elopements I’ve planned and photographed for LGBTQ+ couples: Courtney and Nadine’s Duck Pond elopement and Ryanne and Meredith’s Roanoke Airbnb elopement. I’ve also had the privilege of photographing LGBTQ+ couples to celebrate their engagement or anniversary. Here are the blogs for those adventure sessions if you’d like to see more: Levi and Zach’s Fae Cottage Flower Farm Adventure Session in Roanoke, Virginia; Meredith and Ryanne’s Roanoke Star Engagement Session; and James and Pedro’s At-Home Photoshoot Adventure Session in Downtown Roanoke.
Maybe you have plenty of inspiration, but you need planning resources, here a few blogs I’d recommend to help you get started:
